Is Food Freedom Possible?

Why is it so hard to NOT EAT when you’re NOT hungry?

I mean, I kinda know the answer. I’ve done a lot of study on body image, food addiction, and the psychology of eating.

I’ve eaten so many different ways, and honestly, I got something valuable from all of my diets.

But, I’m tired of all the FOCUS on food…even though it’s on whole, healthy, “real” food. I’m tired of always thinking about, planning and worrying about food. And subsequently, about my body.

Here’s what I really want: to eat in a way that makes me feel good, is good for the environment, that doesn’t cause me to gain weight, and is stress free.

Is that possible?

It never has been for me. I’ve tried many times. But, here I go again. I’ve pulled out my worn copy of “Women, Food and God.” I’m inspired. But I’m also scared. Will I gain 10 pounds? Why do I care if I gain 10 pounds? Am I mature enough, self disciplined enough?

While sitting on the grass, I shared all this with a safe friend. She gets it. It was important for me to say it out loud. To be honest.

So, today I’ve eaten when I felt I needed and wanted food. I’ve enjoyed yummy, healthy things. I’m not hungry. But, I’m fighting the temptaion to grab more food. Why?

What am I trying to fill? If I don’t fill it with food, what WILL I fill it with?

These are questions I still need to answer.

But I do know one thing that’s helping me is Jesus’ words: “Do not worry about what you will eat or drink, or your body what you will wear.”

I’ve had this mantra in my head: “Do not worry.” It’s helping.

Do not worry about what to eat.

Do not worry when you want to eat even when you’re not hungry.

Do not worry about being self-controlled enough.

Do not worry about gaining weight.

Phew. Ok. Writing this out helps. For now I’m going to take a walk instead of going into the kitchen. Then, in a couple of hours it will be time to make a yummy meal for my family. And, I’m not going to worry about it.